"disciples" - poem video, published by serotonin press.

this poem speaks to the deceptive nature of the authoritarian ecosystem of american football that convinces all participants of the authority and dominance of pursuing its mountain for the proposed, propagandized, benefit of a long, healthy life.

in reality, in our desire to believe in this mountain to protect our health and happiness long term, the exciting yet dangerous nature of the sport becomes the blinder for immediate and long-term health, personal and familial, consequences awaiting us on the journey and at the summit of the mountain's ascension.

in the middle of our struggle to win, we lose sight of how these coaches are constrained by their own lack of job security, pursuing athletic success before personal growth and familial health, sacrificed for the sake of athletic glory, often extending their untamed rage upon their players.

every words, behaviors, and ways of speaking imbed into the psyche and ego of the players, leaving them with a distorted operating system of how to treat the people they lead.

players become the image of their leaders, though we often believe we are only extracting the good and not the bad. it is the whole person we embody, leading players to become perfectly molded the continuation of this mentality of "putting the team first," "falling in line," and financial or professional success is more important that personal health and familial unity, which runs the same course as historical authoritarian regimes, the same power structure of Nazism, fascism, and dictatorship.

we will glorify coaches and players who pursue and conquer this foreign mountain, but then ignore the flaws and character issues during their tenure, or after their time in the sport is over, believing off field problems to be unrelated to their commitment to the sport instead of their own person and families.

in reality, it is the sacrifice of character for athletic success that is the cause of off-field problems, anything to win, perpetuating a mentality of violence, control, denigration of supposed inferiors, and entitlement that creates the ecosystem of destruction, unsafe for any participant, fan, coach, or player.

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