If I get the promotion, then I'll feel confident.

If I lose the weight, then I'll feel confident. If I get the compliment, the validation, then I'll finally feel confident.

Here's the problem with that equation: even when X happens, the feeling doesn’t last, and you end up chasing validation.

Nicole Kalil, author of Validation Is for Parking and host of the This Is Women's Work podcast, joins me to explain why confidence was never something you earn from the outside.

Confidence is actually a firm and bold trust in yourself, and it gets built through five specific things.

If you've done all the right things and still feel like something's missing on the inside when it comes to feeling confident, this conversation is the reframe you've been waiting for.

What You’ll Learn

• The false equation of confidence ("if X happens, then I’ll feel confident") and why it turns you into a validation junkie
• Why confidence is built inside-out, not handed to you from the outside
• The five confidence builders that work
• Why failure actually builds confidence
• The difference between fear that’s a warning and fear that’s an invitation, and how to tell them apart in your body
• How to model real confidence for your kids without pretending to have it all figured out

Links:

• Validation Is for Parking by Nicole Kalil
• The Confidence Workbook: Build It From the Inside Out
• This Is Women’s Work podcast

--

🧠 What's your capacity pattern?

Take the free 2-minute quiz and unlock The Capacity Code — a personalized private podcast episode for your specific nervous system.

→ Take the Capacity Pattern Quiz