This week, Gavin prefers them small, David can't remember babies, there is no good news this week, we honor our most long-distance DILF, we rank the top 3 gay things that aren't gay, and this week we are joined by writer and West-coaster Maggie Gottlieb who talks to us about having kids later in life, what it's like to win an Emmy, and why, after all of the crap her kid put her through, she's thinking of doing it again.

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This week, David spends spring break amongst the trash, Gavin "goes to a concert," we love sloppy boobs, Gavin reads the bible, we make an apology to our listener, and we round out this week with the top 3 crucifixions.

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This week, David is humiliated, Gavin has the best weekend of his life, David doesn't know what to do during a tantrum, we rank the top 3 worst gay people, and this week we are joined by Danny Bennett, who talks to us about his tutoring company, how to keep phones away from your kids, and answers the easy question "what is the problem with the American education system?"

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This week, David's ego gets knocked down 2 pegs, Gavin's kids are driving, old cartoons are racist, we have *some* good gay news, we rank the top 3 wars, and this week we are joined by podcaster, author, influencer, comedienne, and ray of light Anna Przy who talks to us about her daily affirmations, how NOT to raise your kids, and why she's known as the queen of millennial mental health.

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This week, David says the same thing he's been saying for months, we lust after our DILF of the week, we rank the top 3 90's sitcoms, and this week we are joined by actor, producer, Mom, and all around joy Becky Lythgoe as she chats with us about the dramatic entrance of her son, who she really is on the inside, and what is making everyone gayer.

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This week, David's a winner, baby, Gavin gets schooled by his son, David has some ancestral drama, we finish out our "Babies 101" course with talking about the first three months, we rank the top 3 Babies, and David closes out the show with a reading of "Yertle the Turtle."

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This week, David's daughter finds new ways to win an argument, Gavin and David and covered in 24 inches of white stuff, we start a "Babies 101" course, we rank the top 3 dogs, and this week we are joined by Gavin's new crush Kaitlin Hannig who talks to us about being a mom, surviving a cult, Utah real estate, and being a social media phenom who isn't afraid of standing up for what she believes in.

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This week, Gavin enjoys at little Schadenfreude at his daughter, David misses his sacred window, there's no good news, Ricky Martin is our everything, we rank the top 3 weirdest and worst songs to figure skate to, and this week we are joined by author and former secret service agent Cory Allen who chats with us about being in the secret service, how secret he had to be about his gay identity, and what Michelle Obama's Taco Bell order is.

Questions? Comments? Rants? Raves? Send them to GaytriarchsPodcast@gmail.com, or you can DM us anywhere @GaytriarchsPodcast