In this episode, I'm joined by Dr Thedy Veliz, a child and family therapist and founder of the Institute for Non-Formulaic Youth, to explore his framework for non-formularity.

Thedy Veliz, PhD, is a child and family therapist in private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area. He is the founder of the Institute for Non-Formulaic Youth. He recently completed his PhD at the California Institute of Integral Studies which is based in San Francisco. Dr. Veliz primarily works with parents of difficult children to help them understand the source of their children’s behavioral, learning, social, and emotional challenges. This understanding is then used to adjust their parenting interventions to downregulate their children’s sensitive nervous system. Dr. Veliz has a bachelor’s degree in mechanical engineering, a master’s in business administration, and a master’s in counseling psychology. Prior to becoming a psychotherapist, he held positions in engineering design and finance management at energy and technology companies.

Dr Thedy Veliz makes the case that these children aren't broken or bad, they're wired with a nervous system that's exquisitely susceptible to their environment, and that the variable we can actually change is the environment around them, not the child. We talk about why punishment so often backfires, why behaviour is the last thing to surface after a long and invisible build-up of stress, and the powerful shift from correcting our children to connecting with them. Thedy also shares the PACE stance for parents (Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity, Empathy) and the link between this sensitive neurobiology and real gifts like creativity, empathy and a fierce sense of social justice.

Find out more at https://www.nonformularity.com/ where you can also download Thedy's free parenting guide.

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About the Host: Jules De Vitto is a transpersonal coach, trainer and experienced educator for Highly Sensitive People. She helps those who identify with the traits of high sensitivity to navigate emotional overwhelm, step into their authentic power and align with their true purpose in life. She is a published author and wrote one of a series of books on Resilience, Navigating Loss in a time of Crisis. Her research has also been published in the Transpersonal Coaching Psychology Journal and Journal of Consciousness, Spirituality, and Transpersonal Psychology.

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In this heartfelt and honest conversation, I am joined by integrative psychotherapist and HSP coach Simone De Costa, breathwork facilitator and coach Alan Friday, and Clinical Psychologist and conscious parenting coach Dr Genevieve Von Lob. We are the co-facilitation team behind the annual HSP Retreat in Devon.

Together, they explore what it means to "unmask" - the process of shedding the adaptive personas we build to fit in, survive, and belong, and returning to our authentic selves. The conversation covers how masking often begins in childhood (especially for highly sensitive people), the roles we unconsciously take on, such as the people-pleaser, peacekeeper, or achiever, and the personal toll of living behind these masks over time.

We each share our journey of unmasking - from burnout and crisis moments that became catalysts for deeper self-inquiry, to the gradual, courageous process of learning to trust our inner voice and body. We discuss how "coming home to yourself" is less about reaching a fixed destination and more about cultivating a safe, compassionate inner refuge - one built through embodied practices, self-acceptance, and genuine community.

The episode closes with three practical tools for embodiment: breathwork and diaphragmatic breathing (Alan), the mindful body scan (Simone), and the three-sync check-in — tuning into thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations simultaneously (Genevieve).

We also give a glimpse into our upcoming four-day HSP Retreat in Devon - a deeply nourishing, spacious, and welcoming container for sensitive people who are ready to finally exhale, belong, and be themselves.

Join our HSP Retreat June 11-14th, in Devon, UK

Support the show

About the Host: Jules De Vitto is a transpersonal coach, trainer and experienced educator for Highly Sensitive People. She helps those who identify with the traits of high sensitivity to navigate emotional overwhelm, step into their authentic power and align with their true purpose in life. She is a published author and wrote one of a series of books on Resilience, Navigating Loss in a time of Crisis. Her research has also been published in the Transpersonal Coaching Psychology Journal and Journal of Consciousness, Spirituality, and Transpersonal Psychology.

You can stay connected with Jules through...
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The Highly Sensitive Human Academy™ - join our 3-month professional training: coaching Highly Sensitive People

Join out HSP Retreat
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In this episode of the Highly Sensitive Human Podcast, I’m joined by researcher, educator and author Kaaryn Cater for a deeply insightful conversation on what it truly means to be a Highly Sensitive Person - particularly within the context of education. Together, we explore how high sensitivity shows up in learning environments, and why so many Highly Sensitive children and adults struggle within traditional education systems. From sensory overwhelm and emotional intensity to overthinking, perfectionism, and difficulty with boundaries, this episode highlights the often unseen challenges that sensitive individuals face in classrooms and beyond.

Kaaryn also shares insights from her upcoming book, Understanding the Highly Sensitive Learner, offering guidance for parents, educators, and Highly Sensitive individuals across all stages of life.

Dr Kaaryn Cater is an educator, coach, speaker and researcher with over 30 years of experience in education, coaching and professional development settings – and is the founder of The Mindwise Connection. Kaaryn specialises in supporting highly sensitive children, adolescents, adults, and the people who live, learn and work alongside them. She is passionate about sensitivity education and promoting wellbeing through focusing on maintaining nervous system balance and harnessing personal strengths to help highly sensitive people thrive in education, careers, work and life.

You can learn more about her work, resources, and services at https://www.mindwiseconnection.com/

Support the show

About the Host: Jules De Vitto is a transpersonal coach, trainer and experienced educator for Highly Sensitive People. She helps those who identify with the traits of high sensitivity to navigate emotional overwhelm, step into their authentic power and align with their true purpose in life. She is a published author and wrote one of a series of books on Resilience, Navigating Loss in a time of Crisis. Her research has also been published in the Transpersonal Coaching Psychology Journal and Journal of Consciousness, Spirituality, and Transpersonal Psychology.

You can stay connected with Jules through...
Instagram
Linkedin
The Highly Sensitive Human Academy™ - join our 3-month professional training: coaching Highly Sensitive People

Join out HSP Retreat
Become a supporter
Disclaimer