In this episode, I’m joined by Josh Shay.

Josh is a coach who works with pornography addiction and the fallout that comes with it. Before that, he was what most people would call high functioning. Successful, visible, respected. All while hiding alcoholism and a porn addiction that was running his life underneath it.

This conversation sits inside illusion, validation, and what it costs to hold everything together.

Josh speaks about being an overachiever who could perform at a high level while everything underneath was falling apart. The energy it took just to maintain the image. To keep people seeing what he wanted them to see while hiding what was actually going on.

What stood out in this one is how much of his identity was built on external validation. Awards, recognition, status. Not because he was arrogant, but because he needed it to feel like he was enough. And how quickly that falls apart when the addiction catches up.

We go into the moment where everything collapsed. Losing his role, being confronted by the people around him, and having to make a decision. Keep going the way he was going or face what was actually there.

From there, the conversation moves into responsibility.

Not just stopping the behaviour.
Understanding how you got there in the first place.

Because putting something down is one thing.
Seeing why you needed it is something else entirely.

We also talk about ego.

How easy it is to chase attention.
How easy it is to build a version of yourself that looks good from the outside.
And how different it feels to step away from that and live a quieter life that is actually aligned.

This one is honest.

Not about perfection.
Not about having it all sorted.

About what it takes to go from performing your life to actually living it.

The question Josh leaves for the next guest is this.

What does it mean when something is done out of love and exists beyond good and evil?

It’s You. Oh Fuck. It’s ME. In Session with a Psychotherapist
Hosted by Chad Taylor. Author of It’s You. Oh Fuck. It’s ME

No tips.
No fixing.
Just real conversations.

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