Addiction, astrology, and emotional healing take center stage in this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, as Sonia sits down with humanistic astrologer Jessica Lanyadoo. Together, they unpack how addiction isn’t just about substances—it’s about emotional patterns, coping mechanisms, and the ways we abandon ourselves. Jessica brings a grounded, no-nonsense approach to astrology, helping Sonia explore how tools like astrology, community, and self-awareness can support sobriety and long-term healing.

What role does emotional regulation play in addiction? Can astrology reveal patterns behind compulsive behaviors or anxiety? How do dopamine-driven habits like scrolling or shopping mirror substance use? Sonia and Kathleen guide the conversation through big questions around fate vs. free will, the psychology of addiction, and whether spiritual tools—like astrology—can become coping mechanisms themselves. The discussion also explores the complexities of recovery spaces, including the benefits and challenges of 12-step programs, shame, and accountability.

The conversation weaves together concepts like harm reduction, emotional processing, and the neuroscience of addiction. Jessica introduces the idea that addiction is often rooted in an inability to tolerate feelings, rather than a lack of willpower. She breaks down how different types of anxiety and coping behaviors can manifest, and how misdiagnosis—both psychologically and personally—can keep people stuck. The idea of “momentum” becomes a powerful framework: how addictive behaviors build quickly, while healing and self-connection require slower, intentional practice.

Through personal reflections, Sonia shares moments from her own sobriety journey—navigating divorce, resisting the urge to drink, and recognizing how other behaviors can mimic addiction. The episode shifts into a deeper, more vulnerable space as they explore recovery tools like AA, the concept of “dry drunk” vs. true sobriety, and the emotional weight of making amends. Jessica offers a nuanced take on “living amends,” boundaries, and why healing doesn’t always require direct reconciliation—sometimes it requires protecting yourself while still taking accountability.

This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources.

Highlights

00:00 – Introduction to Jessica Lanyadoo and her humanistic approach 01:15 – What humanistic astrology actually means 03:00 – Addiction beyond substances: emotional and behavioral patterns 05:30 – Astrology’s perspective on different types of addiction 08:15 – Dopamine, escapism, and modern-day addictive behaviors 09:30 – Can astrology become a coping mechanism? 10:45 – Is addiction fate or free will? 12:30 – Physiological vs. emotional components of addiction 14:00 – Different types of anxiety and how they show up 16:30 – Misdiagnosis and why some treatments don’t work 17:45 – The concept of momentum in addiction vs. healing 19:00 – “Dry drunk” vs. true sobriety 20:00 – Why AA works (and why it doesn’t for everyone) 22:00 – Shame, community, and healing in recovery spaces 24:00 – The complexity of group dynamics in AA 26:30 – Boundaries, triggers, and navigating recovery communities 28:00 – The truth about making amends 29:30 – What are “living amends”? 31:30 – Trauma, safety, and when not to reconnect 34:00 – Self-abandonment and taking personal accountability

Jessica's Links

Ghost of a Podcast

Access free horoscopes + other goodies and classes available for purchase at lovelanyadoo.com

SIS Links

💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen

📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email

📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram

🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast

📸 Kathleen’s Instagram

Sonia sits down with Dr. Emma Kay, professor at the University of Alabama at Birmingham School of Nursing and a nationally recognized researcher focused on HIV care, substance use, harm reduction, and recovery. Together, they unpack the intersection of addiction, stigma, and healthcare systems, and explore how a more compassionate, whole-person approach can change outcomes. Sonia guides this conversation to help reframe how we think about recovery, disclosure, and what meaningful care actually looks like in practice.

The discussion moves beyond surface-level conversations about addiction and into the realities people face navigating HIV, substance use, and medical systems that often prioritize one condition over another. Questions emerge around why patients don’t disclose substance use, how stigma subtly shows up in healthcare settings, whether abstinence-only models are limiting recovery options, and what happens when providers assume noncompliance. It also touches on the gap between medical innovation and lived patient experience, especially when it comes to trust, access, and education.

The conversation highlights how recovery is often non-linear, why patient autonomy matters, and how small behavioral shifts can represent meaningful progress. It also sheds light on systemic barriers including cost, lack of education in medical training, and disparities tied to race, geography, and socioeconomic status. The contrast between rapid advancements in HIV treatment and the slower evolution of addiction care reveals where healthcare systems are still falling short.

Sonia and Dr. Kay also talk about—what it actually looks like when patients feel seen, heard, and respected versus judged or dismissed. From early moments in an HIV clinic filled with unexpected vulnerability to broader reflections on stigma and resilience, the episode brings forward the emotional and relational side of care that often gets overlooked in clinical conversations.

This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our substack for extra tips, tricks and resources.

Highlights

00:00 Introduction to Dr. Emma Kay and her work

01:00 Dr. Kay’s non-traditional path into social work and research

02:30 First experiences in an HIV clinic and shifting perspectives

04:00 Understanding HIV as a chronic condition vs stigma

05:30 The overlap between HIV and substance use

06:30 Risk factors and misconceptions about HIV transmission

07:30 Early experiences with patient vulnerability and resilience

09:00 Abstinence-based models vs harm reduction realities

10:30 Lack of harm reduction resources in certain regions

11:30 Why patients don’t disclose substance use

12:30 Gaps in education around harm reduction

13:30 What relational harm reduction actually means

15:00 Key principles: autonomy, humanism, pragmatism

16:30 Incremental progress and redefining success in recovery

17:30 Why recovery is rarely linear

19:00 Whole-person care and addressing underlying needs

21:00 Subtle stigma in healthcare settings

22:30 Misconceptions about adherence and drug use

24:00 Harm reduction vs abstinence models

25:30 Aging population with HIV and comorbidities

27:00 Treating HIV like any other chronic condition

28:30 Innovation in HIV care vs addiction care

30:00 Disparities in overdose rates and access to care

32:00 Trust gaps in marginalized communities

34:00 The role of community-led solutions

35:00 Cost barriers and access to life-saving resources

Dr. Emma's Links

https://scholars.uab.edu/5926-emma-kay

https://www.linkedin.com/in/emmasophiakay/

SIS Links

💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen

📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email

📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram

🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast

📸 Kathleen’s Instagram

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Conflict avoidance and people-pleasing show up in so many women's stories around alcohol — yet they rarely get the airtime they deserve. In this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen sit down with Anna Lecat, intimacy and conflict consultant, global speaker, and author of Loving Conflict: Creating Collaboration Where Others See Division. Anna has spent decades across cultures, continents, and boardrooms persuading people that learning to conflict well is one of the most loving things we can offer each other.

What does it actually mean to fight kindly? Why do so many women reach for a drink before a hard conversation — or avoid it entirely? And what is it about anger that feels so unbearable to sit with?

Anna unpacks the tango metaphor at the heart of her work — conflict as tension plus connection, not threat plus danger. She walks through a practical spectrum for building conflict confidence, starting with low-stakes settings like restaurants and working up to the relationships that flood us most. The conversation explores emotional responsibility, nervous system regulation, and how early experiences with anger shape us as adults — often leading us to read conflict as rejection when it's really someone else's old wound surfacing.

Then things get personal. Sonia opens up about pouring a glass of wine before calling her mother — and how that glass became a bottle. Kathleen shares her own story of returning to her hairdresser with honest, gentle feedback and what that small act revealed about the difference between avoiding conflict and moving through it with care.

This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our Substack for extra tips, tricks, and resources.

Highlights

[00:01:00] Anna reframes conflict as a doorway rather than a threat

[00:02:00] Her mission: persuading people to fight kindly

[00:03:00] People who are deeply loved don't need to wage war

[00:05:00] Connection and uplift extend beyond romance to friends, parents, and coworkers

[00:06:00] Why women are socialized to avoid conflict

[00:07:00] Conflict as a tango — listening, suggesting, responding in turn

[00:08:00] Using nonverbal tango exercises in corporate workshops

[00:11:00] Men in Beijing end up in tears during a two-minute eye contact meditation

[00:13:00] Why sending food back at a restaurant is the perfect place to start

[00:14:00] "If you think you're enlightened, go spend a week with your parents"

[00:15:00] Kathleen's hairdresser story becomes a master class in kind conflict

[00:18:00] Sonia's glass of wine before calling her mother — and how it became a bottle

[00:20:00] Why anger is the most stigmatized emotion across every culture

[00:21:00] Anger reveals a person's deepest fears and values — slow down and listen

[00:22:00] How Anna navigates her own anger — consent first, then curiosity

[00:27:00] It only takes one person to shift the dynamic of a relationship

[00:29:00] People-pleasing as a conflict strategy — and how to tell it from self-protection

[00:33:00] Practice conflict in low-stakes settings before the ones that flood you

[00:37:00] Anna's nightly practice: revisiting hard moments and calming her nervous system

[00:43:00] Start small, start outside, get good at it. It becomes a superpower.

Links:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1966629974

https://annalecat.com/

SIS Links

💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen

📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email

📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram

🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast

📸 Kathleen’s Instagram

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.