In this episode of the Spiritual Sobriety Podcast, Chris explores:

• The eight worldly preoccupations and how they drive our suffering
• How our egoic thinking mind generates thousands of feelings from every perception
• The Buddhist teaching of the Two Arrows and how we wound ourselves twice
• Practical tools from both Buddhism and the 12 Steps to respond with loving-kindness

This episode is for you if:

• You've been feeling trapped by emotions you can't seem to control
• You're stuck in patterns of grabbing for comfort or pushing away discomfort
• You're ready to approach your suffering with more honesty and self-compassion

The Invitation

Sobriety is not just the removal of alcohol. It is the return to your truest self.

In this conversation, we explore what it means to meet our emotions directly without being ruled by them, and how spiritual awareness can gently reshape the way you experience the push and pull of joy and suffering.

Featured Practice

Take 3-5 minutes today to try this. You will need a pen and paper.

1. Draw two columns and write these four pairings as opposites: happiness vs. suffering, fame vs. insignificance, praise vs. blame, gain vs. loss.
2. Read each term slowly and notice what sense feelings arise within you.
3. Write down the feelings that surface under each term.
4. Ask yourself: "Where do I see myself grabbing toward one side or pushing away the other?"

Let whatever arises be enough.

Journal Prompt

"What would it look like if I trusted my ability to hold both the joy and the sorrow, instead of reaching for one and running from the other?"

Write without editing. Let honesty lead.

Key Reflection

"The second arrow is always optional. The first arrow is pain. The second is the story we tell ourselves about that pain."

If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone walking their own sobriety path.

Chris McDuffie is a licensed psychotherapist, mindfulness teacher and sober coach in private practice. He is the CEO and lead therapist for Chris McDuffie Counseling, a leading concierge practice caring for mental and behavioral health needs. He lives in Carlsbad, California, and holds a Master of Social Work from Fordham University. He teaches recovery from addiction and co-occurring disorders through the spiritual practices of Buddhism and the 12 Steps.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone walking their own sobriety path.

Follow Chris for reflections and meditations:
Website: https://www.chrismcduffietherapy.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chris__mcduffie/

Insight Timer: https://insighttimer.com/buddhanature

You don’t have to walk this path alone.

In this episode of Spiritual Sobriety, Chris McDuffie introduces Dr. Paul O’s framework for building spiritual sobriety, using the metaphor of a baseball diamond to map the four bases of recovery: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual sobriety. Drawing on Buddhist teachings, the 12 Steps, and the premise that no external person or event can make us angry, Chris offers a practical and empowering vision of what it means to round the bases of sobriety. Not once, but again and again, one day at a time.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why our emotions, including anger, begin within us, not outside us

• Dr. Paul O’s four bases of spiritual sobriety: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual

• How the Eight Worldly Preoccupations from Buddhism connect to our anger and suffering

• What it means to stay “at bat” in long-term recovery with progress, not perfection

• How physical, mental, and emotional healing all build toward a loving connection with yourself and others

In This Episode:

• Chris recaps the Buddha’s Four Noble Truths and the 12-Step journey covered so far

• An introduction to Dr. Paul O’s book You Can’t Make Me Angry and its central premise

• The baseball diamond exercise: labeling each base and identifying who is on the opposing team

• First base—physical sobriety: eating, sleeping, hydrating, exercising, and healing the body

• Second base—mental sobriety: confronting the “thinking disease” of addiction and trauma

• Third base—emotional sobriety: identifying, feeling, and responding from our core values

• Home base—spiritual sobriety: choosing love, forgiveness, and seeing the good in ourselves and others

• W.H. Auden’s poem As I Walked Out One Evening and loving our crooked neighbor with our crooked heart

Featured Practice:

Take 5–10 minutes today to work with the baseball diamond exercise. You will need a pen and paper.

1. Draw a baseball diamond on your paper and label the bases: First Base: Physical Sobriety, Second Base: Mental Sobriety, Third Base: Emotional Sobriety, Home Base: Spiritual Sobriety.

2. Ask yourself: who is on the opposing team trying to tag you out? Name the emotions, people, or patterns at each position. Anger at third base, fear as the opposing manager, and so on.

3. Now fill in your own team. Who is supporting your recovery? Who is your coach?

4. Sit with this question: “Am I committed to rounding the bases again and again, not just once?”

5. Notice what arises without judgment. Let it be information, not indictment.

Journal Prompt:

“Where am I on the baseball diamond today and what would it look like to take one honest step toward the next base?”

Key Quote:

“Spiritual sobriety is a fluid, dynamic dance and freedom from our suffering, from dukkha, from our attachments, and from grabbing and aversions.”

Chris McDuffie is a licensed psychotherapist, mindfulness teacher and sober coach in private practice. He is the CEO and lead therapist for Chris McDuffie Counseling, a leading concierge practice caring for mental and behavioral health needs. He lives in Carlsbad, California, and holds a Master of Social Work from Fordham University. He teaches recovery from addiction and co-occurring disorders through the spiritual practices of Buddhism and the 12 Steps.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone walking their own sobriety path.

Follow Chris for reflections and meditations:
Website: https://www.chrismcduffietherapy.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chris__mcduffie/

Insight Timer: https://insighttimer.com/buddhanature

You don’t have to walk this path alone.

In this episode of Spiritual Sobriety, Chris McDuffie explores the relationship between suffering and gratitude as complementary forces in recovery. Drawing on the Buddha’s Four Noble Truths and the teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh, Chris guides listeners through a live contemplative exercise and offers a fresh perspective: that learning to sit with suffering, rather than escape it.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why suffering and gratitude are not opposites—but partners in healing

• How our attachments and aversions generate anxiety, guilt, and remorse

• The Buddhist teaching of No Mud, No Lotus as a guide through pain

• Why turning inward—not outward—is the path to lasting relief

• A practical gratitude exercise to use daily as a relapse prevention tool

In This Episode:

• Chris introduces the mantra: “It’s okay to look at the past, just don’t stare” • The First Noble Truth and how we generate our own suffering through attachment • Cicero’s teaching that gratitude is the father of all virtues

• Thich Nhat Hanh’s No Mud, No Lotus and the secret to transforming suffering • The dog tied to a post: a Buddhist metaphor for how addiction traps us in circles • A live two-column T-chart gratitude exercise with reflection on the feelings it surfaces

Featured Practice:

Take 5–10 minutes today to practice this contemplative gratitude exercise. You will need a pen and paper.

1. Find a quiet space and take three slow, grounding breaths.

2. Draw a T-chart on your paper. Label the left column: I am grateful for having. Label the right column: I am grateful for not having.

3. Free-write in both columns. There are no wrong answers—this is your personal reflection. 4. Notice what feelings arise and write them down. If nothing surfaces, that is okay. 5. Ask yourself: “What does this list reveal about what I truly value?”

Journal Prompt:

“What would it look like if I trusted the process of healing instead of reaching outward to escape my pain?”

Key Quote:

“Bringing gratitude to my suffering is the most loving, kind way to respond. Remember—no mud, no lotus.”

Chris McDuffie is a licensed psychotherapist, mindfulness teacher and sober coach in private practice. He is the CEO and lead therapist for Chris McDuffie Counseling, a leading concierge practice caring for mental and behavioral health needs. He lives in Carlsbad, California, and holds a Master of Social Work from Fordham University. He teaches recovery from addiction and co-occurring disorders through the spiritual practices of Buddhism and the 12 Steps.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone walking their own sobriety path.

Follow Chris for reflections and meditations:
Website: https://www.chrismcduffietherapy.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chris__mcduffie/

Insight Timer: https://insighttimer.com/buddhanature

You don’t have to walk this path alone.