This week: a guy in Edinburgh who used a massage gun on his eyeballs for weeks — and is now shocked it went badly. A former Zambian president who has been in a funeral home for almost a year because his family and the government can't agree on who gets to attend his own funeral. Berlin losing a war against caterpillars in hazmat suits. A man in California who shot at a police helicopter on his birthday. And not one but two pilots in Canada who were flying planes without actual licenses. Humans are out here. Three hosts. Four continents. Zero doom. 🐷

This week: a 14-year-old in Norway who keeps stealing buses — and keeps getting away with it. A teenager in Nigeria who almost became a congressman by claiming to be 30. A Atlanta neighborhood being haunted by 50 driverless cars doing laps at 6am. And a New York man who drove drunk to a police station to rescue his friend who was arrested for drunk driving. Humans are out here. Three hosts. Four continents. Zero doom. 🐷