Matthew Efird and his wife, Hannah, were joyfully expecting their second son when the word "abnormalities" during a routine ultrasound changed everything. What followed was a journey into anticipatory grief after their son Noah was diagnosed with Trisomy 13, a condition often described as “incompatible with life.”

In today's episode, Matthew shares what it was like to walk through the remainder of the pregnancy with that knowledge—holding both hope and heartbreak at the same time. He talks about how he and Hannah navigated those months together, how they learned to communicate in the middle of grief, and the intentional ways they chose to spend their time with Noah before he was born.

Matthew also shares about Noah’s birth and the unexpected gift of 57½ hours together — time to hold him, to introduce him to family, and to fully experience what it meant to parent their son on this side of heaven.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The joy of expecting a second child after a season of waiting
• The moment everything changed at a routine ultrasound
• Processing the word “abnormalities” and a Trisomy 13 diagnosis
• Walking through anticipatory grief during pregnancy
• How Matthew and Hannah supported each other in their marriage
• Two simple but powerful questions that helped them communicate in grief
• Choosing to be intentional with the time they had with Noah
• Noah’s birth and the gift of 57½ hours together
• What it meant to parent Noah during his brief life

Be sure to join us next week for the second half of this conversation, when Matthew shares what life looked like after Noah’s passing and offers insight into grief from a father’s perspective.

Resources & Links:

• Matthew’s book: Even Though We Will
• Website: https://eventhoughwewill.com/
  
  

If this episode resonated with you, we invite you to share it with someone who may need encouragement today.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

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Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

In this second half of my conversation with Keallie Wozny, we shift from Trevor’s story to what it looks like to live in the aftermath of his death.

Keallie shares with honesty and clarity about the questions that so many suicide loss parents carry — questions like why and could I have done something to prevent this? She reminds us that while those questions are natural, we are not always given the answers we long for — and learning to trust God with the unknown becomes an important part of the journey.

We also talk about the realities that aren’t always openly discussed:
the stigma surrounding suicide loss, the fear that suicide might be an unforgivable sin, and the uncertainty some parents carry about their child’s eternity. Keallie gently points listeners back to the truth of Scripture and the character of God — merciful, compassionate, and trustworthy.

Throughout this conversation, Keallie offers deeply practical insight drawn from her own experience:

• The physical toll of grief and how it affects the body
• The importance of community and being cared for by others
• How to approach milestones, anniversaries, and unexpected triggers
• Why seeking “signs” from loved ones can be misleading—and how to instead recognize God’s presence
• What it looks like to worship, even when you don’t have the strength to sing

She also shares simple but powerful encouragement for those early in their grief journey — that joy does return, even if it looks different than before. As she beautifully puts it, grief and joy can coexist.

Click HERE to listen to the first half of my conversation with Keallie.

Click HERE to find Keallie's book "Circle of Sorrow" on Amazon.

Click HERE to follow Keallie on Instagram.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

In this first half of my conversation with Keallie Wozny, we begin by getting to know her son, Trevor, as she shares stories from his childhood, his love of music, his strong work ethic, and his desire to serve others, including his dream of becoming a Marine.

But as his story unfolds, things begin to shift.

What follows is a difficult and complex journey as Trevor begins to struggle with mental health challenges that grow increasingly severe. Keallie walks us through those changes with remarkable clarity, offering an honest look at what their family experienced as confusion, fear, and uncertainty began to take hold.

This episode includes a detailed account of the days leading up to Trevor’s death by suicide. While this is a hard story to hear, it’s one that reflects the reality many families face ... and one that deserves to be told with both honesty and care.

You may recognize Keallie as the author of the book Circle of Sorrow. In our conversation, she explains that this title comes from the realization that, after losing a child, you are ushered into a kind of fellowship of suffering. It’s a circle no one chooses to join, and yet within it, there is a shared understanding among those who walk this road. It is both a painful place to be and, at the same time, a place where you are not alone.

And even in the midst of this heartbreaking story, you’ll hear glimpses of God’s presence ... moments of grace, truth, and redemption that would become anchors for Keallie and her family in the days ahead.

Coming Next:

In next week's episode, Keallie shares what it has looked like to live in the aftermath of Trevor’s death. We’ll talk about the questions many parents carry, the stigma surrounding suicide loss, and the practical ways she has learned to walk through grief with faith and honesty.

Get a copy of Keallie's book, Circle of Sorrow, HERE.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

“You’re not broken… you’re becoming.” ~Tom Snyir

In this second half of our conversation, Tom and Heather Snyir share what life has looked like in the days, months, and years since their daughter Katie Rae went to Heaven.

We talk about the realities of everyday grief - navigating the things people say, learning to live with “grief brain,” and facing simple questions that suddenly feel anything but simple.

Tom and Heather also reflect on how grief has changed them - how it’s reshaped their perspective, their relationships, and the way they move through the world.

Tom opens up about his personal journey with PTSD, depression, and suicidal thoughts, and the people and faith that helped carry him through. He also shares about his devotional book, Branches of Grace, and the message of hope it offers to those walking through trauma and loss.

This conversation is honest, practical, and full of insight for anyone navigating life after the loss of a child.

Key Takeaways

• Presence matters more than words when supporting someone in grief
• You are allowed to set boundaries and protect your heart
• Grief changes you ... and that doesn’t mean something is wrong
• You don’t have to walk through dark seasons alone
• Healing and pain can exist side by side

Resources & Mentions

• Tom's book: Branches of Grace: Devotions from the Front Lines of Faith is available on Amazon. Click HERE to find it.
• Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (U.S.): Call or text 988

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

"God doesn’t always remove the suffering—He enters into it with us.”

In this first half of our conversation, Tom and Heather Snyir share the story of their daughter, Katie Rae—a creative, joyful teenager who made everyone around her feel like they were her best friend.

Katie was diagnosed with leukemia at just four years old. Tom and Heather share what it was like to navigate months of treatment, a bone marrow transplant, and the gift of more than a decade of remission.

Then, as a teenager, Katie was diagnosed with glioblastoma, an aggressive and deadly form of brain cancer. In this episode, Tom and Heather begin sharing what that journey looked like for their family and how they walked through those difficult days together until Katie went to Heaven.

Throughout this conversation, you’ll hear how their faith was stretched and sustained—not through easy answers, but through God’s presence in the middle of uncertainty.

Resources & Mentions

• Tom Snyir’s book: Branches of Grace: Devotions from the Front Lines of Faith - Available HERE.

Coming Next

In next week's episode, Tom and Heather share what life has looked like since Katie went to Heaven. We talk about grief in everyday life, how people respond to loss, and Tom shares more of his personal journey through PTSD, depression, and finding hope.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

Today I resume my conversation with Leah Sweetman, as she shares what the last two years have looked like since the loss of her son, Nathan.

She talks honestly about the first year of grief—the intensity of it, the impact it had on her thoughts and physical health, and the difficulty of approaching significant dates and milestones. Leah also reflects on how her experience has changed over time. Not becoming easier ... but different.

We also discuss the tension many parents feel when they begin to notice even small shifts in their grief. Leah offers a helpful perspective: Moving forward does not mean leaving your child behind—it means getting closer to the day you'll see them again.

This episode includes practical encouragement for newly bereaved parents, especially those who have walked through addiction or complicated relationships with their child. Leah emphasizes the importance of being patient with yourself, giving grief space, and continuing to trust God one day at a time.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

• The first year of grief and anticipatory grief around milestones
• How the second year can feel different
• The physical and neurological impact of grief
• Learning to function while grieving
• The tension around “moving forward”
• Giving grief intentional space
• Encouragement for parents of prodigal children
• Trusting God with your child’s life and future
• How loss can reshape perspective and faith

Leah’s Support Group (Bereaved Moms):

• Zoom meeting: Third Wednesday of each month at 8:00 PM Eastern
• Text “grief” to 502-206-2255 for reminders

Listen to the first half of Leah's story HERE.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

“Meet me at the gate, Nate.”

In this first half of our conversation, Leah Sweetman shares the story of her son Nathan—a bright, imaginative, strong-willed young man who brought both great joy and deep challenges to their family. As Leah introduces us to Nathan, we begin to understand not only who he was, but the complexity of the road he walked.

From an early age, Nathan struggled with behavioral and mental health challenges that eventually led to addiction. Leah speaks candidly about the impact this had on their family—the fear, the chaos, the exhaustion, and the deep love that never wavered.

This episode also explores what it means to surrender when your child is struggling and you cannot fix it. Leah shares how God met her in those moments of desperation and began teaching her what true surrender looks like—not giving up, but placing her son into God’s hands.

You’ll also hear the story behind the phrase Leah now carries with her: “Meet me at the gate, Nate.” A simple expression that holds both grief and the steady hope of reunion.

This is an honest and powerful beginning to a story that many will recognize in pieces of their own.

If this episode resonates with you, please consider sharing it with another grieving parent. And if you haven’t already, leaving a rating or review helps others find hope in the midst of loss.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

In this episode of the While We’re Waiting – Hope After Child Loss podcast, I continue my conversation with Kirsten Black, author of the Faithful Paradox blog.

In Part One, Kirsten shared about her son Ezra, his battle with leukemia, and the early realities of grief that reshaped her life and faith. Today, we pick up where we left off, continuing our discussion of her blog post, “10 Things That Are Different From What I Expected.” Listen HERE to Part One of our conversation.

Today Kirsten offers honest insight into some of the more complex and often unexpected aspects of grief—especially within the context of family, faith, and daily life.

In this episode, we discuss:

• How family members often grieve differently—and how to extend grace in those differences
• Why healing can bring its own kind of sorrow
• The difference between joy and happiness in the midst of grief
• The quiet, ongoing reminders of loss in everyday life
• Why faith does not necessarily make grief feel easier
• The desire to be “unknown”—and why that doesn’t remove the pain
• Learning to live without clear answers or understanding
• The reality that hard days still come, even years later

Kirsten also shares reflections from her third year of grief, including a deepened longing for heaven, a shift in how she views grief—not as something to overcome, but something to gently carry—and the reminder that truth does not always bring immediate comfort, but it is still worth holding onto.

Toward the end of the episode, Kirsten offers thoughtful encouragement for parents who are in the early days of grief, reminding them that this journey is a marathon, not a sprint, and that they do not have to walk it alone.

This conversation is both honest and hopeful—a reminder that while grief changes us, God remains faithful, even in the tension we don’t fully understand.

Links & Resources

Visit Kirsten's blog here: Faithful Paradox Blog

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org