Lessons for Lisa: Notes to My Future Self is a reflective solo series under the Notes From the Edge podcast umbrella.

These aren’t lectures.

They aren’t polished TED Talks.

They’re honest conversations with the woman I’m still becoming.

Each episode is a letter to my future self, exploring the lessons I’m learning in real time about healing, identity, recovery, relationships, resilience, and what it means to keep choosing growth over performance.

In Episode 001, The Hidden Cost of Keeping Score, I explore the emotional ledger so many of us carry.

The people who never apologized.

The conversations we keep replaying.

The betrayals we can’t seem to release.

The silent calculations that quietly steal our peace.

What if letting go isn’t about saying what happened was okay?

What if it isn’t permission, approval, or forgetting?

What if it’s simply deciding that yesterday no longer gets to write today’s story?

If you’ve ever found yourself replaying old conversations, carrying resentment, or struggling to release what someone else never acknowledged, this conversation is for you.

Welcome to Lessons for Lisa: Notes to My Future Self.

Perhaps you’ll find a few notes to your future self along the way.

Welcome to the Edge.

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Notes From the Edge is a podcast exploring trauma, psychology, identity, recovery, leadership, creativity, and what it means to be fully human through honest conversations and reflective storytelling.

Connect with Lisa Lacy

Website: www.lisalacy.com

LinkedIn: https://linkedin/in/lisalacycalm/

Welcome to the first episode of Midnight Menopausal Meanderings, a new recurring series under the Notes From the Edge umbrella.

This series is where the polished masks come off. It’s part storytelling, part philosophy, part neuroscience, part marriage counseling you didn’t ask for, and occasionally… it starts with something as ridiculous as biscuits and gravy.

In this deeply personal solo episode of Notes From the Edge, Lisa Lacy explores what happens when two people in recovery, both neurodivergent creatives, both living with mental health challenges, try to build a life together while carrying very different histories.

This isn’t really about biscuits and gravy.

It’s about survival, menopause, addiction and recovery, love after trauma, a 16-year age gap, living with life-threatening illness and about the strange ways ordinary disagreements uncover extraordinary truths.

Sometimes the people we love most become our greatest teachers, not because they’re easy to live with, but because they illuminate the places where we still have healing to do.

This episode is a reminder that the real conversation is almost never the one we think we’re having.

Where ordinary moments become extraordinary conversations, and where healing often begins with asking a better question.

Welcome to the Edge.

www.lisalacy.com

Why is it so hard to trust again after betrayal, even when you know the danger has passed?

In this episode of Notes From the Edge, Lisa Lacy explores the biology of betrayal and why healing is about so much more than “letting it go.”

Together, we’ll explore:
• Why trust is a biological prediction, not just an emotion
• What happens inside the brain and body after betrayal
• Why attachment and fear can exist at the same time
• How survival strategies become identities
• Why hypervigilance, people-pleasing, and emotional numbness are often adaptations rather than personality traits
• How trust can be rebuilt one safe experience at a time

If you’ve ever questioned yourself after infidelity, emotional abuse, manipulation, or repeated violations of trust, this conversation is for you.

You are not broken.

Your survival system has simply been trying protect you.

What did you perform in order to survive?

These are the conversations we should have been having all along.

Welcome to the Edge.

www.lisalacy.com

What if healing isn’t about becoming someone new?

What if it’s about having the courage to finally tell yourself the truth?

In this episode of Notes From the Edge, Lisa Lacy sits down with counselor Teddy Engels for a thoughtful conversation about self-awareness, personal responsibility, and the questions that shape our lives. Together they explore what it means to know yourself without judgment, why curiosity is more powerful than certainty, and how genuine healing begins when we stop trying to be fixed and start becoming fully seen.

Rather than offering easy answers, this conversation invites listeners to ask better questions about who they are, what they’re carrying, and what they’re ready to release.

If you’ve ever wondered what real personal work looks like, this episode is an invitation to begin.

In this episode:
• What it really means to know yourself
• Why healing starts with curiosity instead of judgment
• The difference between being “fixed” and being understood
• What we should expect from therapy and from ourselves
• How honesty creates lasting transformation
• Lisa’s signature question: “What did you perform in order to survive?”

www.lisalacy.com

About Notes From the Edge

These are the conversations we should have been having all along.

Hosted by Lisa Lacy, writer, trauma educator, and executive advisor, Notes From the Edge explores trauma, identity, recovery, leadership, and the psychology of performing our lives.

Subscribe for new conversations that challenge assumptions, inspire reflection, and invite you to stop performing your life.™

Teddy Engels | LinkedIn

Welcome to another episode of Notes From the Edge.

In this unscripted solo conversation, Lisa Lacy explores the masks we wear to survive and the identities we often mistake for who we really are.

From mom guilt and relationships to the growing misuse of the term “narcissist,” Lisa challenges listeners to look beneath the labels and ask deeper questions. Why do we perform certain roles? What happens when survival becomes identity? And how do we begin returning to ourselves?

This episode is part reflection, part conversation, and part invitation to become curious about the stories we’ve been telling ourselves.

In this episode we explore:

• Why we overuse psychological labels
• Mom guilt and carrying responsibility that isn’t ours alone
• The difference between survival and identity
• The masks we wear in relationships and at work
• Finding congruence instead of performance
• The question that sits at the heart of Notes From the Edge:

What did you perform in order to survive?

If this conversation resonates with you, subscribe, share it with someone who needs to hear it, and join us live for future episodes where we have the conversations we should have been having all along.

Welcome to the Edge.

www.lisalacy.com

Why do so many intelligent, capable people stay trapped in relationships that continue to hurt them?

In this episode of Notes From the Edge, Lisa Lacy sits down with Steve Barton to explore trauma bonds through the often-overlooked male perspective. Together, they unpack how childhood conditioning, identity, fear, shame, and the need to earn love can keep people locked in unhealthy relationship patterns long after they know they need to leave.

Steve introduces his Game of Ten® framework, explaining how awareness becomes entangled with fear, self-doubt, guilt, and shame, and how healing begins not by finding a different relationship, but by returning to ourselves. The conversation expands beyond romantic relationships into leadership, personal growth, recovery, and the stories we tell ourselves to survive.

If you’ve ever asked yourself:

• Why is it so hard to leave?
• Why do I keep repeating the same patterns?
• What did I learn about love that no longer serves me?
• What did I perform in order to survive?

…this conversation is for you.

Website: www.stevebartoncoaching.com

Website: www.lisalacy.com

Lisa Lacy is a writer, trauma educator, executive advisor, and host of Notes From the Edge, where we explore the conversations we should have been having all along. Her work focuses on high-functioning survival, identity, leadership, recovery, and the hidden performances people develop to navigate difficult environments.

If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who may need to hear it.

Until next time… stop performing your life, tell the truth about your story, and we’ll meet you back here on the edge.

Connect with Steve BartonConnect with Lisa Lacy

Some of the most important conversations happen in the gray areas.

In this episode of Notes From the Edge, Lisa Lacy sits down with author and former military officer Richard Spegal for an honest conversation about leadership, identity, creativity, mental health, and the stories we build around ourselves to survive.

Richard shares his journey from serving in the military to becoming an award-winning fantasy and paranormal author, explaining how writing became more than a career. It became a lifeline.

Together, they explore:

• Why creativity can become a survival strategy
• The difference between media myths and the reality of living with bipolar disorder
• Why morality is rarely black and white
• How fiction can reveal deeper truths about the human experience
• The importance of talking openly about mental health instead of relying on stereotypes
• The question at the heart of Notes From the Edge: What did you perform in order to survive?

Whether you’re interested in psychology, leadership, trauma, storytelling, or simply understanding people a little better, this conversation offers a thoughtful look at the complexities that make us human.

Find Richard Spegal and his work:
Website: https://richardspegal.com
Explore his novels, including Eternal Nights and the Wolves & Ravens Trilogy, along with book trailers, updates, and upcoming releases.

If this conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs to hear it.

I’m Lisa Lacy, Writer, Trauma Educator, Executive Advisor, and author of the upcoming memoir Notes From a Certified Madwoman.

Learn more at: www.lisalacy.com

Welcome to the Edge.

What do you do when life gives you a second chance?

In this powerful episode of Notes From the Edge, I sit down with Gaylen Wilson, heart transplant survivor, relationship coach, author, and founder of The Monument Method Institute. Gaylen’s story is one of extraordinary reinvention. From farm failure and alcoholism to career collapse, heart failure, and ultimately receiving a life-saving heart transplant, his journey is a masterclass in resilience, purpose, and starting over.

But what struck me most wasn’t just his survival story.

It was the beautifully simple relationship framework he and his wife Heather developed through decades of hardship, recovery, healing, and love.

Together, we explore what Gaylen calls the Sanctuary Bond: the idea that our relationships should become a refuge from life’s chaos rather than another source of stress.

In this conversation, we discuss:

• How emotional safety transforms relationships
• Why most relationship problems aren’t really communication problems
• The simple habits that strengthen connection and trust
• Reinvention after loss, failure, illness, and identity collapse
• Twenty years of sobriety and the lessons that came with it
• Men’s mental health, shame, and vulnerability
• Building a meaningful next chapter at any age

Gaylen’s wisdom is practical, accessible, and immediately applicable. His zest for life is contagious, and his perspective is a reminder that no matter where you are today, your story is not over.

If you’re struggling in a relationship, navigating a difficult season, wondering what’s next for your life, or simply need a dose of hope and inspiration, this episode is for you.

Sometimes the strongest relationships aren’t built by extraordinary people.

They’re built by ordinary people who learn how to become a safe place for one another.

I’m Lisa Lacy, and these are the conversations we should have been having all along.

Welcome to the Edge.

www.Lisa Lacy.com

Where to find Gaylens’ Books and Work:

http://www.monumentmethodinstitute.com/