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Host Tara McCausland interviews psychotherapist Scott Stolarick, who shares how his work in corrections and with sex offenders led him to recognize trauma as a driver of maladaptive behavior and the need for both accountability and support rather than shame. They discuss common misconceptions about trauma, differences between recent and historical trauma, and how childhood coping strategies can become harmful in adult relationships. Scott emphasizes trauma’s personal nature, the importance of validating first disclosures, building safety and trust, careful history-taking, and thoughtful use of modalities like EMDR with informed consent, concluding with encouragement for those beginning or continuing recovery.

00:00 Conference Invitation
01:40 Meet the Host and Guest
03:49 Scott’s Background
04:43 Seeing Trauma in Sex Offenders
09:44 Myths About Trauma
13:05 Fresh vs Historical Trauma
14:19 Trauma for Addicts vs Partners
17:54 Childhood Maladaptive Coping Skills Brought into Adulthood
21:32 What Counts as Trauma
25:06 Building Resilience
28:33 Why Trauma Awareness Matters
31:17 Healing Order of Operations
35:54 Effective Trauma Modalities
37:25 Closing Advice for Recovery
38:36 Final Thanks and Wrap

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Host Jonathan L. interviews guest Heather B. about surrender as a key recovery principle. Heather shares formative experiences where prayer was her refuge amid family abuse and dysfunction, her brother’s fatal accident, and a first marriage marked by discoveries of multiple addictions that led to her choosing divorce. Heather describes healing trauma through therapy and shares how applying SAL’s three-step surrender process (“on the phone, on my knees, in the box”), has helped her learn to relinquish control and trust God, allowing her to find peace amidst many of life's challenges.

00:00 Conference Announcement
02:03 Meet the Host and Guest
02:40 Early Experiences with the Power of Prayer
05:15 First Marriage and Betrayal
08:03 Miracles and a New Path
09:28 Second Marriage Growth
12:37 Therapy and Trauma Healing
14:22 Learning the Surrender Process
16:38 What is Surrender?
19:17 Phone Knees Box Method
23:23 Letting Go of Outcomes
28:27 Regulating Big Emotions
30:40 Handling Intrusive Thoughts
32:30 Daily Spiritual Practice
35:33 Advice for Newcomers
37:22 Encouragement to Return
38:56 Closing Thanks and Wrap

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Host Tara McCausland welcomes Dr. Jill Manning for part two of a discussion on pornography and dating. This episode covers what to do when a dating relationship is already affected by pornography. Manning advises an immediate “slow down,” warning against the myth that marriage or sex will solve pornography or sexual addiction, and urges partners not to proceed toward engagement or marriage while addiction is active; she cites guidance that a year of sobriety and recovery work is ideally established first. They discuss avoiding codependent “fixing” by the non-using partner, clarifying responsibility, and how marriage stress can escalate compulsive behavior. Manning describes recovery markers beyond abstinence—insight, humility, openness, honesty, transparency, firm boundaries, and emotional maturity—and notes compulsive sexual behavior often co-occurs with mental health issues.

00:00 Conference Announcement
01:19 Podcast Welcome
03:41 Slow Down First
08:46 Boundaries Not Fixing
11:16 Marriage Myth Debunked
19:33 Leverage Before Marriage
26:18 Mental Health Underneath
28:41 Signs of Real Recovery
36:03 Avoid Codependency
40:15 Hopeful Closing

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Host Tara McCausland speaks with Dr. Jill Manning about empowering singles to prevent pornography problems through education, value clarification, and open communication. Manning rejects the narrative that “all men look at porn,” noting both genders can struggle and that “common” doesn’t mean healthy; she warns that this belief enables use and often causes individuals to abandon personal values or ignore discomfort around pornography use. She advises bringing the topic up in dating situations after some trust is built, prepping with other meaningful discussion topics, and paying attention to a person's comfort and authenticity around the subject of pornography. Manning explains pornography use is never a "small issue" because it consistently undermines healthy relationship development citing research linked to porn use and relationship dissatisfaction and increased divorce risk.

00:00 Conference Announcement
01:20 Meet Dr. Jill Manning
02:36 Why This Topic Matters
05:20 Jill’s Experience: Dating and Talking About Pornography
10:21 Myth: Everyone Does Porn
15:36 Clarifying Values and Ethics
25:23 Research and Real World Harms
28:40 How to Bring It Up in Dating
36:47 Why It’s Never a Small Issue
42:05 Part Two Teaser and Wrap

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Jonathan L welcomes Mitch H, who shares his journey from early pornography exposure to escalating sex and lust addiction marked by secrecy, workplace boundary violations, confession, marital strain, and cycles of relapse. Lasting change began when a sponsor challenged him to fully commit to recovery and to do whatever recovery required. Mitch describes humility as the key to sustainable recovery—“seeing things as they really are” and staying “right sized,” without ego or self-condemnation. He explains how humility fuels honesty, connection with God, and trust in a sponsor, making it essential to working the steps and maintaining long-term change. Mitch closes by encouraging newcomers to keep coming back and reassuring them that healing and freedom are possible.

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In this episode, host Tara McCausland interviews Steven Croshaw, president and co-founder of S.A. Lifeline Foundation, who is also her father. Steven shares his journey of battling sexual addiction, starting from exposure to pornography at a young age, through years of hidden behaviors and relapses, to ultimately achieving sobriety and long-term recovery for nearly two decades. He emphasizes the importance of rigorous honesty, humility, accountability, and the critical role of understanding and addressing trauma for relational healing. The conversation highlights the key aspects of long-term recovery: the significance of embracing compulsive, problematic sexual issues as an addiction; the interplay of lust and shame and what truly drives addiction; working the 12 Steps; developing top lines, bottom lines, and boundaries to sustain sobriety.

Real-life challenges and insights from both Steven and Tara provide a deep, personal perspective on the complexities and rewards of recovery.

Read Steven's article HERE.

00:00 Positive Sobriety & Keys to Long-Term Sex Addiciton Recovery Takes w/ Steven Croshaw
02:20 Steven's Early Struggles with Addiction
04:44 Marriage and Hidden Behaviors
07:02 First Confession and Continued Struggles
08:36 Second Confession and Realization of Addiction
10:14 Arrest and Turning Point
11:30 Understanding Addiction and Recovery
21:49 The Role of Lust and Shame in Addiction
26:16 Defining Sobriety in Recovery
30:54 Understanding Lapses and Relapses
31:47 Keys to Long-Term Recovery
33:31 Daily Practices for Recovery
37:52 Addressing Betrayal Trauma
49:11 The Role of Resentment in Addiction
53:55 Bottom Lines and Top Lines in Recovery
55:51 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

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This podcast episode features a women's 12-step panel from the 2025 S.A. Lifeline Virtual Conference. Moderated by Tara McCausland, the discussion centers on the SAL recovery puzzle, circle models, and how these tools aid in healing from betrayal trauma. The panelists—Madison, Jan, Sarah, and Lisa—share their unique recovery journeys, emphasizing the importance of a willing heart, seeking spiritual connection, humility, honesty, supportive community, qualified therapy, boundaries, and the surrender process. Each woman provides personal insights and practical advice on navigating the complex emotions and challenges in their healing process, reaffirming that recovery is a gradual but achievable goal.

Join us for the upcoming S.A. Lifeline Foundation Vision Cast!

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In this episode of the Pathway to Recovery podcast, host Tara McCausland speaks with therapist Tammy Gustafson about 'incomplete recovery' in the context of sex addiction and how it affects both partners in the relationship. Tammy explains the concept of incomplete recovery, where behavioral changes without deep, relational character work leave partners feeling unsafe and dissatisfied. The episode also explores how triggers are indicators of unresolved trauma needing attention and offers strategies for calming the nervous system. Tammy provides advice for both addicts and betrayed partners, emphasizing the importance of emotional safety, self-compassion, and continued hard work for healing. She recommends shifting from performance-based to identity-based recovery and underscores the necessity of ongoing deep, character-transforming work for genuine recovery.

Want to connect with Tammy? Check out her website here.

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