Are you a real estate investor struggling to find funding for your deals? You’re not alone. Many aspiring and experienced investors have hit the same wall, believing that it takes money to make money and that a lack of cash flow is the number one obstacle holding back their real estate ambitions. But what if the real problem isn’t the money—it’s how you think about getting it?That’s the central lesson from a recent episode of the “Raising Private Money” podcast, hosted by Jay Conner and featuring special guest Willie Oyola, a Florida-based investor who has raised over $3 million in private money since joining Jay’s elite mastermind group just three years ago. Willie’s story is proof that the key to funding your real estate deals lies not in who you know, but in what you say and how you say it.The Road from Banks to Private LendersLike many investors, Willie Oyola began his real estate journey with single-family rentals, going the traditional route—20% down payments through banks, slowly burning through his cash reserves. When he started tackling fix-and-flips, hard money lenders became his go-to, but again, the costs and fees added up quickly.The breakthrough? Private money—capital sourced directly from everyday people, not institutions. Unlike hard money, which often comes through brokers pooling investor funds (and charging hefty fees and high interest), private money is a direct relationship: you, the investor, and an individual lender in your community. These lenders aren’t necessarily wealthy; they’re ordinary folks with some money sitting idle, often in retirement accounts or savings, unhappy with traditional returns.Mindset Over MechanicsIt’s easy to think that landing private money is all about strategy—networking, pitching, salesmanship. But as Willie Oyola reveals, the real tipping point is mindset. Most investors mistakenly believe they must “pitch” a deal, asking for money and sounding desperate or salesy. Instead, the real game-changer is shifting to an educator’s mindset—sharing the opportunity, teaching others about your process, and letting the right people gravitate towards your offer.“You’re not asking for money at all,” explains Willie Oyola. “You have to position things differently—don’t talk about a deal at all, even if you have one in mind. Focus on your program, not your need.” When you approach conversations this way, you sound confident and in control—not like someone who’s scrambling for cash.The Private Money AdvantageWhat makes private lending so attractive, both for the investor and the lender? For starters, the terms are dictated by you, the borrower, not the lender or a faceless bank. Lenders get bank-level security, with their investment secured against real estate via recorded mortgages, promissory notes, and title insurance—the same way a bank protects its loans. No profit splits, no surprise losses, just a reliable, predictable rate of return.It’s a win-win. Private lenders get a higher, more stable return than stocks or mutual funds, and they get the peace of mind that comes with knowing their investment is backed by real property, not paper. Meanwhile, you get to grow your business without personal guarantees, credit checks, or mountains of paperwork.Growing Your Network—The Right WayWorried that you don’t know enough wealthy people? That’s another myth. Most of Willie Oyola’s lenders were referrals, friends of friends, or people he met by getting involved in local organizations like BNI or community business groups. The secret is to “go where the money is”—becoming active in your community and expanding your circle, while leading with curiosity and service.When asked how he starts conversations about private lending, Willie Oyola keeps it simple and intriguing: “I teach people how to get high rates of return safely and securely.” The goal isn’t to sell, but to spark curiosity and plant seeds for future partnerships.Securing the Future—for EveryonePrivate money is not just about funding your deals—it’s about creating lasting relationships where everyone benefits. As Willie Oyola says, “Banks don’t own real estate; they loan on it. Now you—and your lenders—can do the same.”If you’re ready to move past the limiting belief that you “don’t have the money” for your next deal, maybe it’s time to shift your mindset, master the art of sharing opportunity, and unlock the power of private money. The next conversation you start could change your business—and someone else’s financial future—for good.10 Discussion Questions from this EpisodeWhat are the main differences between hard money and private money lending, as explained by Willie Oyola in this episode?According to Willie Oyola, why is mindset considered the biggest factor in successfully raising private money?How does Willie Oyola recommend positioning conversations about private money, and why is separating ...
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